Piranha 3D swam into theaters over the weekend and gave the audience exactly what we came for; Blood and Boobs. The film gains it’s terrified cast from mega television hits like Vampire Diaries, a popular drama series involving Steven R. McQueen along with Jessica Szohr from Gossip Girl. The film starts off in your typical lake town flooded by booze fueled teenagers enjoying spring break. Jerry O’Connell “Derrick” plays your controversial director/sleaze bag with a video camera – almost like a better looking Joe F. This summer smash of a horror film also features Elizabeth Shue and Adam Scott as the sherrif and scientist along with hillarious cameos by director Eli Roth and Christopher Lloyd.                                                                                                                                                                                                                    The movie starts off setting up the stars of the show in a typical predicament – Sheriff Julie Forester *Elizabeth Shue* is swamped over spring break and needs her son Jake “Steven” to watch his younger siblings; resulting in Jake missing his chance to spend spring break  with his long time crush Kelly “Jessica”.  Meanwhile an underwater earthquake has released  schools of prehistoric man-eating piranhas into the lake. While Jake picks up his sister he meets beautiful Dannie – played by UK’s Kelly Brook. This is where we are introduced to Derrick, an overly intense director with a ground breaking new technique for porn.  Derrick enlists Jakes help as his companies location scout and they are set to leave the following morning. Jake, being the responsible brother he is, pays off his siblings to stay home and mind themselves for the day.  The sheriff teams up with scientist Novak “Adam” and after seeing his co-workers being eaten alive they capture a specimen and rush to the neighborhood fish expert – insert Christopher Lloyd. We learn that this typical breed of piranha has been extinct for millions of year and the gore is kicked into high gear from here on out. A wet t-shirt contest turns into a blood bath as our sheriff and scientist valiantly save as many topless train wrecks as possible while Jake and Kelly spend the day drinking champagne and seeing adult filming at it’s finest. Things take a turn for the worst when Jake notices siblings are not safe at home like planned and need to be rescued off a near by island. This detour causes the boat to become stuck and our young cast to realize that they are not the only things in the water.                                                                                                                                                                                                                While most of the carnage is predictable and bloody, Eli Roth manages to create suspense by paying homage to one of the greatest horror movies of all time – Jaws. The underwater angle of floating bums and kicking feet remains a timeless favorite of horror buffs around the world and fits in perfectly in this underwater battle. Though the angle is used through out the entire film it’s most memorably used on a bikini clad raver who is waving her wand while floating in a tube. It start off by seeing the lake through the piranhas eyes. You hear the bass lines pumping down to the murky depths and they start to venture up to the surface. You see a pale bottom with ill-fitting bottoms floating in an inner tube. One particularly hungry fish starts off by taking a quick bite of the meaty flesh. The girl is startled and lets out a yelp, then another, and then another which turns into a blood curdling scream. The underwater angle captures the girl flailing underneath the water with schools of fish zipping around her struggling body and taking chunks off of her every time they go by. The next 7 minutes whirl by with varying camera angles, some above surface as well. A girl is eaten underneath the water so quickly she appears to be twirling until she stops and you see legs eaten to the bone. Another favorite shot features a curvy topless woman para-sailing behind a speedboat. She is lowered and raised again and again before settling down into the water. The fish zip through the water and devour her lower half. The next time she is raised up she is a leg-less, lifeless corpse no longer squealing in joy.                                                                                                                                                                                                                          While Eli Roth is winning over his older, more classic horror fans he is also appeasing the 15 year olds who got into the theater by shocking their senses with fantastic 3D shots. Balloon sized breasts reach out so close that I saw a couple of the brave boys reach out to touch them. Piranhas leap from the lake and come right at you – blood seems to mist the air in front of you. A crowd favorite is a shot of an unfortunate male losing what little manhood he had left. The ravenous fish gulps the severed appendage and, much to the viewers delight, burps it back out into the water- mangled and close enough to touch. A personal favorite of mine is when Jake goes to kiss Kelly and she runs away to lean over the side of the boat. The 3D makes you feel like you are the unfortunate part of the lake getting vomited on.                                                                                                                                                                                                                         All in all Piranha 3D delivered exactly what you hoped it would and more. The 3D was great and the acting was surprisingly good as well. It sated the gore seekers with mangled limbs and torn organs, the teenage boys with plenty of nudity, and even made the girlfriends in the audience happy with a touch of romance. I make a point of seeing every horror movie that hits the big screen and I throughly enjoyed it. It even scared me enough that I hesitated before getting into the lake the morning after. I would say if you have 15 bucks, a friend to laugh/scream with, and a free afternoon to definitely check it out.