Month: March 2008

The Bank Job

The Bank Job I know what you’re thinking. Jason Statham has made another movie to follow up that Uwe Boll movie that he made that nobody watch so why would I want to watch this one. Well before I answer anything for you I would like you to do one thing. Go grab a pencil very quickly. Please don’t read on to see where I’m going with this, just get a pen or a pencil. When you’ve got one, make the star trek wave with your hand (a peace sign with all four fingers instead of two) and then put the pen/pencil in between. Now squeeze with your other hand. That hurt didn’t it? Well that’s what you get. Every time Hollywood gets it right and makes a good movie that’s really enjoyable, nobody watches it. (For those who did watch the movie I apologize for the pain). This movie was great, it wasn’t the best of the year so far, but it was by far the best thing that’s been out in weeks. The movie stars Jason Statham and Saffron Burrows in a heist movie which unlike many others only spends about the first half of the movie on the actual heist. Jason Statham’s character is a married man with two girls who gets a job from an ex (Burrows) about robbing a bank. She’s a little iffy...

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Horton Hears a Who

Horton Hears a Who Horton Hears a Who is the new animated Dr. Suess film. The film stars the voices of Steve Carell and Jim Carrey, however don’t worry, unlike Carrey’s last Seuss attempt, this one doesn’t leave you running for the exits. The movie is a nice family comedy about an elephant named Horton (Jim Carrey) who discovers the world of the Whos which in Horton’s world is just a small little speck on a pink clover. Horton finds this ‘speck’ and with his great hearing is able to listen in on the whos inside. His great hearing talent however is not shared by any of the other animals and many see this poor elephant as a crazed animal. None take these thoughts to any place higher, however, than the Kangaroo, who is appropriately named Kangaroo. She hops around with her child in her pouch and spends most of the movie attempting to plot for the speck to be destroyed since she sees it as an attempt to get children to start imagining and thinking God forbid. The Whos on the other hand are on the eve of a big celebration, which I can’t remember but I’m sure starts with ‘who’ something, and everything seems fine until the Mayor of Whoville (Steve Carell) begins to notice these tremors which are caused by Horton moving around to much while...

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21

21 21 is a “heist” type film that stars Jim Sturgess, Kevin Spacey, and Kate Bosworth. Takes place mostly at MIT College and of course in glorious Las Vegas. Unfortunately this film shoots for blackjack and it busts about halfway through. Jim Sturgess plays Ben Campbell, an MIT student who has all the grades and requirements to get into Harvard Med but, like most adolescents who try to go to college, doesn’t have the near three hundred grand that he needs. During his days at MIT he is inventing a machine with his two friends for a science fair type situation when one day in class he manages to prove Issac Newton wrong and brand him a thief. This impresses the professor Micky Rosa who is played by Kevin Spacey. The movie then takes off when Ben is invited to a group of six people who go to Las Vegas on weekends and using their brilliant minds, count cards as a team to make as much money as they can. This is seen as Ben as a solution to his money problem and states that once he gets the three hundred grand he needs he’s out… yeah, right. The acting for this movie is passable at best. Spacey perhaps gives the best performance of the group but that isn’t saying much. The students all play their parts under the...

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Snow Angels

Written by: David Gordon Green Directed by: David Gordon Green Starring: Sam Rockwell, Kate Beckinsale, Michael Angarano and Olivia Thirlby 2008 is poised to be another excellent year for movies. There are more great films at this point (March 31st as I write) of this year than there was during the now legendary 2007. Oddly enough, there has been a common thread through all the quality material thus far, everything is dark. This trend continues with David Gordon Green’s Snow Angels. The movie’s tone is set in the opening scene. A high school marching band is practicing for an upcoming football game in Snowy Small Town, USA (no precise location is given). Citizens are shown going about their day. The marching band make some mistakes much to the chagrin of the band teacher. Two loud gunshots in the distance interrupt the normalcy. “Weeks Earlier” flashes on the screen. For the remaining duration, we will see the events that led to this unseen incident. This is one of those rare movies where it is difficult to decide who is the main character. I’ll just start with Artie (Michael Angarano), a teenager (and member of the aforementioned school band) who spends his free time working at a local Chinese restaurant. Also working at the restaurant is Artie’s old babysitter Annie (Kate Beckinsale). Annie is unofficially separated from her husband, Glenn, played...

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Robert Kurtzman’s The Rage

“The Rage” is directed by Robert Kurtzman, who is responsible for directing the near masterful work known as “Wishmaster”, and partly written by him also. The cast is full of actors and actresses who are unknown for a good reason. A mad scientist experiments with a virus known as rage. He uses this to experiment with innocent victims deep in the woods. When a few of his patients escape, the woods become terrorized by blood hungry monsters who are in search of their next victims. In this case, the victims being the usual group of partiers. It does take a kind sadistic talent to artistically splatter blood and spew guts, and Robert Kurtzman has that perverse talent. Everything, from the horrible acting to the rambunctious occurrences, are overlooked thanks to Kurtzman’s knack for directing over-the-top, campy horror films. I realize that it’s bad. Scratch that. I realize that it’s really bad, but this horror film actually brings some new ideas to the table. One innovative idea  being the mutated vultures who vomit on and devour their victims. If your hungry for a blood and guts galore, then look no further. Maybe it’s not the goriest film ever made (Dead Alive), but it’s surely packing lots of grotesque moments that will have people arguing over this subject matter. “The Rage” is a gooey and delightfully gory feature guaranteed to satisfy any...

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