I managed to get a exclusive look at the upcoming film The Mutant Chronicles, blasting its way into theaters some time in 2008. The exact release date is unknown as of this writing, but it’s certain that it will be some time this year. The big question is whether or not it is worth the time and price of admission.

During the 23rd century, a soldier by the name of Mitch Hunter (Thomas Jane) guides an army of fierce fighters to battle underground mutants after opening a seal to an ancient creation. This creation is a machine known to turn humans into blade-slinging mutants determined to wipe out mankind. It is up to Mitch and his fierce army to save the world. Quite possibly the first ever pen-and-paper-role-playing-game-turned-movie, The Mutant Chronicles is surprisingly satisfying.

Loud, exciting, very funny, and brutally entertaining, it just might be the action film of the year — a movie full of great fight scenes, excitement around every corner, and visually arresting set designs that will hold even the most cynical viewer’s interest. Truthfully, it is the most fun I’ve had at the movies in a long time.

Sporting an A-list action cast that includes Ron Perlman (Hellboy) and Thomas Jane (The Punisher), it is sure to please a certain targeted audience that has a lust for action and a strong appetite for gore. The thrills, the shocks, and the sheer enjoyment of going to the movies is all there and in full, ass-kicking form.

But don’t get me wrong, readers, this isn’t a masterpiece. It does have its glitches like underdeveloped characters, loads of commentary, and Ron Perlman’s acting (which is nearly laughable). Not to mention the small cameo appearance from John Malkovich was unnecessary and could’ve saved the filmmakers a few bucks by casting an unknown actor for this role. Things like that are giving the movie a bad rep after its premier at the Cannes Film Festival. However, there are enough adrenaline-charged moments to flush out these glitches and make for pure entertainment.

In the final act, we get to see Hellboy and The  Punisher go head-to-head in a battle to the death. It’s an exhilarating moment added to the tons of violence beforehand and a great finish to a spectacular fusion of sci-fi, action, horror, and comedy. The Mutant Chronicles is an authentic film and certainly worth the admission price, popcorn and all. 4.5/5 stars

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

12-year-old Mauro is left alone after his parents get taken away by the military during the regime of 1970’s Brazil. Mauro’s parents told him they were going “on vacation” to keep Mauro from worrying and claim to be back before the World Cup of soccer. Now, Mauro must wait patiently for his parents return from vacation in hope that they will arrive before Pele leads his country to victory.

Like most foreign films, it’s is beautifully shot. Unfortunately, it suffers from leaving viewers who aren’t familiar with the game of soccer isolated and distant from what’s going on. This builds up frustration for those who know there is a good movie to be found here. Foreign film buffs will most likely be pleased and scope out the masterpiece within. However, if you are the casual movie goer, it ends up being nothing spectacular and overlooking the film will save you some precious viewing time.

The first half of the movie is dull and doesn’t show much of a breakthrough until the third act, where we see a glimpse of a great movie. It does have moments of humor wedged in that up the entertainment level, but the bottom line is that even a great ending can’t subdue the mild frustration beforehand.

Vacation is strong in most aspects of film including direction, acting, and cinematography. Cao Hamburger does well at avoiding clichés and directs the film with style, Michel Joelsas gave a true performance as a distraught child, and the cinematography was remarkable. This is what makes it a well made Foreign film and helped gathered up praise from both critics and audiences.

I acknowledge all of the films major accomplishes, but I can’t quite say that it held my interest. The dilatory pace and timid approach nearly put me to sleep and while most of the performances are authentic, the characters are underwritten. This is a film that I can’t recommend, but do see the talent and reasons for its acclaim. A film that isn’t completely original, but still has a refreshing feel to it. Something that isn’t my cup of tea, but deserves attention. 2.5/5 stars

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

This 2005 flick, written and directed by Adam Rapp, is mostly unentertaining and slightly annoying.  While the film immediately works to portray a melancholy, alternative-lifestyle-feel, it merely comes off as trying to be artsy, rather than actually containing any elements that would actually make it an art film.

 Zooey Deschanel who gave stellar performances in films such as The Good Girl (2002), Eulogy (2004) and The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (2005), stars in Winter Passing (2005), but falls far from the cinematic tree she earlier climbed so high in.  Deschanel plays Reese Holden, the daughter of Don Holden (Ed Harris), a famous, yet reclusive writer who has hidden some manuscripts very desired by the literary world.  After the death of her mother and an emotional separtion with her father, Reese is offered a large sum of money to obtain and release the manuscripts.  As a struggling actor, Reese accepts and ventures home only to find that everything she knew about ‘home’ has changed.

So many elements of this film fail to work.  The character psychology is lacking and the performances are just blatantly unbelievable.  As a usual fan of Ed Harris, I found myself very befuddled and equally dissapointed with his strange bearded character; it merely seemed like a facade to hide his very flat, unfaceted acting.  Will Ferrell even makes an appearance as Corbit, Don Holden’s live-in (friend?).  As he was clearly enlisted as comic relief, he does this in his usual confused, unattached way, but even this doesn’t work for me, it simply falls flat.  We learn almost nothing about Corbit throughout the film and his believability is on par with Maggie Smith in a Sci-Fi flick, it is just so unlikely.   As the film slowly moves to transform Reese and give her a new perspective on the world, you just don’t care by the middle of the film what happens to her and by the end, can you even imagine?

The film just goes nowhere.  Reese Holden is full of angst and confusion, but it just does not pull you in like its meant to.  I lost interest throughout the course of the film and found myself looking at my watch, a tell-tale sign of a bad movie.  I do wish I could get that time back and at the same time ask Adam Rapp why it was so necessary to invest in Winter Passing.  Maybe there is some emotional attachment, or some real-life experience projected in this film by Rapp.  But if this is the case, what a boring experience it must have been, and to be honest, I’m surprised he even remembers, because Winter Passing is truly forgettable.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

After stumbling upon a book in the basement on their new home, twin brothers Jared and Simon Grace, along with their sister Mallory, become pulled into a world of faeries and goblins. This book, known as The Spiderwick Field Guide, was written by a man named Arthur Spiderwick, who was abducted by faeries. It tells them everything they need to know about how to kill goblins and call upon mythical birds for help. Now they must protect the book from these creatures and find Arthur Spiderwick to put an end to the mayhem.

There really isn’t much good to say about this noisy and frantic fantasy that lacks all but a single good actor. Lazy CGI effects bombard the screen, along with screaming faeries that are about as annoying as nails on a chalk board. It is as if they took the cheapest computer technology available, enhanced it ever so slightly, then decided to add some impaired voices into the mix. Nick Nolte, Martin Short, and Seth Rogen are some of the loud, unfamiliar voices that crowd the screen. It really irks me that these characters are so pesky, yet they are voiced by some rather talented people.

It’s an irritating fantasy that seems rushed and deserved a release to the rental shelves rather than to the silver screen with such poor CGI work. Freddy Highmore plays dual roles comfortably, but the supporting cast of live actors (including Mary-Louise Parker who has shown some serious acting skills in the Showtime series Weeds) were unconvincing and the CGI beasties are about as irritating as an itch you can’t reach.

It starts off with dark, atmospheric set pieces that look really good and quickly turns into a ridiculous story gorged with silly moments. The film’s intentions were to take the audience into a world of fantasy (where ridiculous is acceptable to some extent). Instead, the film goes beyond preposterous and ends up being completely far-fetched.

So we have one good actor, several sub-par actors, an overuse of undernourished CGI effects, and a line of uninteresting characters. It’s a putrid mess, a film that doesn’t have a clue as to what defines entertainment and ends up being obnoxious. It is sad that none of this is quality entertainment and all of it is a nuisance to eyes and ears.

The entire film was a waste of time I could’ve spent watching some sort of solid entertainment, and a waste of money the filmmakers could’ve spent making a better film. The bottom line is it was nothing more than a noisy monstrosity and a eulogy to poorly executed family flicks. 1.5/5 stars

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

I love romantic comedies; I hate to admit they are my guilty pleasure.  So, I knew I had to watch “Definitely, Maybe” starring the sexy Ryan Reynolds, Abigail Breslin, Elizabeth Banks, Rachel Weisz, and Isla Fisher.  It was directed and written by Adam Brooks who has much experience in the romantic comedy genre.

Ryan Reynolds plays Will Hayes a Manhattan professional getting a divorce while sharing custody with his 11 year old daughter Maya Hayes (Abigail Breslin).  Maya wants to know the story, from her father, of how her parents met.  He is reluctant to tell the story but decides to make her daughter guess which one of his 3 previous girlfriends is her mother. Will tells her of his college girlfriend Emily (Elizabeth Banks) from Wisconsin who he must leave behind to follow his political dreams and work for the Clinton campaign in New York.  Then comes Summer (Rachel Weisz) the beautiful writer who could get just about any man she wanted.  The third girl is his long time friend and confidant April (Isla Fisher).  Maya soon starts to put all the pieces together and as she uncovers who her mother is she also finds that relationships are complicated.

Writer/Director Adam Brooks adds a bit of spice by letting the audience peek into the Clinton campaign while taking you through the relationships of the main character, which I believe adds more depth to the story.  Although I enjoyed the film I had trouble with the ending but I can’t exactly put my finger on the reason why, I just felt un-emotional and as if it something was missing, other than that just an ok movie.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Director: Tim Burton
Starring: Johnny Depp, Helena Bonham Carter, Alan Rickman

The Premise: Unlawfully sent to prison so the Judge (Rickman) can get his hands on his wife, Sweeney Todd (Depp) returns to discover his wife is dead and the Judge is keeping his daughter captive. He seeks revenge in the most delightfully blood-thirsty way, aided by the bonkers Mrs Lovett (Carter).

The Good: It’s long-since been established that Depp can play just about any character brilliantly. This film is no exception. He sings and slices his way through a dazzlingly dark performance, giving Sweeney a personality that’s both sinister and charismatic. But he’s upstaged every step of the way by Helena Bonham Carter’s portrayal of Mrs Lovett. She’s only supposed to be his sidekick—his enabler, if you will—but she steals the spotlight whenever she’s on screen. It would be an injustice to say she’s comic relief, but my god will she make you laugh. She makes you feel as if chopping up dead bodies and serving them in pies is the most hilarious thing in the world. As if to sugar-coat an already scrumptious main cast, there are some delightful supporting characters. Keep an eye out for Anthony Stewart Head’s cameo, and Sacha Baron Cohen’s performance is pure genius (naturally).

The Bad: The love story involving Depp’s daughter feels a bit rushed and forced—it could have done with a bit more non-singing screen time—and there are a few moments that are heavy on the cheese (try not to cringe when Sweeney sings his heart out about getting his blades back in his possession—it’s not the best number in the film).

Overall Verdict: Laden with Burton’s trademark gothic cinematography and bursting with talent from its illustrious cast, this film aims high and succeeds. Not to be missed!

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Mark Wahlburg and Zooey Deschanel star in this movie.  It is rated R for some self-inflicted violence and runs one hour and thirty-one minutes.

 Another movie by M. Night this movie tries to follow in the footsteps of his other movies, creating suspense and keeping the viewer wondering what will happen.  A young couple whose marriage has been on the rocks find themselves in the middle of a countrywide crisis.  They, along with a friend and his daughter, run to fins a safe haven.  Yet, there seems to be no escape as the mysterious ailment that causes people to kill themselves follows wherever they go.  Finally the couple (Wahlburg and Deschanel) find a place they think is safe and attempt to hide there, with a strange woman and a creepy doll.  The mysterious ailment follows them even there, and no human is safe from this “happening”.  In the end they take a chance and hope that when they go outside things don’t go too bad and maybe they can survive whatever is causing humans to kill themselves.

I have seen many mixed reviews of this movie, and it reminded me of the reviews of his past movies, which were of both versions, loved it and hated it.  While the landscape of this movie is nice and at times beautiful, the movie in itself is not really that good.  I feel like I wasted my money on it and want to ask M. Night to stop trying to live up to the fame of The Sixth Sense.  The actors were dry and seemed to be cardboard cutouts of themselves (as my friend said after we watched the movie).  The dialogue was dull and I found myself laughing through most of the movie because of how bored I was.  I needed to do something to keep myself awake.

As for the plot of the movie, it was so obvious that this was a movie about global warming and the problems that it could be causing.  I felt that watching this movie was like someone was constantly hitting me over the head with an organic environmentally safe hammer trying to give me a green concussion.  It couldn’t have been more obvious or more tree driven if it had been a movie of just a tree for an hour and a half.  In fact I might have liked that movie a lot more because then I would have known going in what I would be getting.  The actors could have been used so much better than they were, especially when you look at some of the other movies that Mark Wahlburg and Zooey Deschanel have done you know that their talents are not being used in this film, and they can do so much better.  The special effects were overdone, and the plot, well it left a lot to be deserved. 

If you want to watch a movie about going green and pollution and global warming go watch An Inconvenient Truth by Al Gore.  It was much more entertaining and less full of itself than this movie felt.  Skip it.  If you want something scary go get gas, the price you pay would be a lot scarier than this movie ends up being.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

In this fun goofy comedy Ryan Reynold’s character Van Wilder is the big man on campus who is putting off graduating college after being there for seven years. Wilder’s dad decides that he’s no longer going to pay for his son’s tuition. The school’s newspaper decides to write a human interest piece on Wilder when he realizes that he needs to graduate and start the next chapter in his life after a party goes aerie. This film is 90 minutes of fun jokes and crazy hijinks, it’s not the kind of movie that makes you think, but the kind that lets you escape from life if only for a little bit or to remind you of the crazy time that is college.

I enjoyed this movie and it definitely launched the career of Ryan Reynold’s the film also stars Tara Reid as a newspaper writer, Kal Penn (Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle) as the assistant, and Teck Holmes(Real World) and Wilder’s roommate/ best friend.

The best part about this film is that the view sees that Wilder isn’t your typical parting big man on campus, but that he feels that everyone no matter what they look like or where they came from should have a good time and one of the best lines from the movie is “You shouldn’t take life too seriously” this is a true statement that our society has forgotten.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

American Meth is a documentary from director Justin Hunt that shows the trials and tribulation families in America can and do face due to the usage of the drug Meth. The movie is narrated in parts by actor Val Kilmar, who has starred in a movie involving meth before called The Salton Sea. The Salton Sea is a pretty cool flick if you haven’t seen it, rent that, instead of this.

American Meth goes from an interesting and potentially educational premise to being a very, very boring and fairly off subject reality show following a more or less uneventful family consisting of two supposed meth addicted parents. The kids are adorable and make for some cute moments overall, which doubles as tugs on the ole heart strings when you look at their overall living situation. However, having spent a great deal of time visiting the ghettos of Missouri and living in at least one trailer park I could have picked out a way more tragic or interesting person or people to follow. More shock value was needed in this production to sober up the minds of casual drugs users and to grasp the attention of those not fully aware of how strong and powerful meth is spreading across our country.  True, the goal of the flick was to possibly show how meth infiltrates every day life and the lives of everyday average people, but ultimately it was with every day average results. Mainly what I witnessed in American Meth was a trailer park couple arguing a whole bunch about crap that didn’t interest me. Hell, that happens all the time without meth.

There are many documentaries starting to surface over the usage of meth and I’ve got to think there are more compelling and overall worthy ones to watch than American Meth.

In fact check Wikipedia for a more revealing look even on the history of meth and what it does, then go walking around your own town and ask some kids where you can score some, and interview people if you want to grasp the reality of it all.

From Wikipedia:
“Methamphetamine enters the brain and triggers a cascading release of norepinephrine, dopamine and serotonin. To a lesser extent methamphetamine acts as a dopaminergic and adrenergic reuptake inhibitor and in high concentrations as a monamine oxidase inhibitor (MAOI). Since it stimulates the mesolimbic reward pathway, causing euphoria and excitement, it is prone to abuse and addiction. Users may become obsessed or perform repetitive tasks such as cleaning, hand-washing, or assembling and disassembling objects. Withdrawal is characterized by excessive sleeping, eating, and depression-like symptoms, often accompanied by anxiety and drug-craving. Users of methamphetamine sometimes take sedatives such as benzodiazepines as a means of easing their “come down”.

Common nicknames for methamphetamine include “meth”, “ice”, “crystal”, “tina”, “p”, “bitch” and “glass”. Methamphetamine is sometimes referred to as “speed”, but this term is usually used for regular amphetamine or dextroamphetamine.”

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Control follows the true life story of punk rock singer Ian Curtis of Joy Division, covering his troubles with love, music, drugs, and epilepsy that led to his untimely death in May of 1980. It’s based on his wife Deborah Curtis’ autobiography Touching from a Distance to make sure everything is accurately displayed on screen.

Shot in beautiful black and white with magnificent clarity and carefully edited, this slick portrait of a musician’s unfortunate life might be masterful for those who are vaguely familiar with the band Joy Division, but everyone else will probably find it ambitiously clichéd in its character insight. It becomes just like every other musician’s rise and fall from fame. Become famous, get addicted to drugs, and die at an early age. It’s nothing we haven’t seen seven or eight times before and becomes dull quickly.

I’m not claiming this is a bad film. Amongst all the boredom (and there is quite a bit of it), there is a low-energized masterpiece in disguise. It just never takes off that disguise to make itself known. Sam Riley puts his heart into this role and is absolutely phenomenal and Samantha Morton does exceptionally well. The direction is sharp and the acting is great, so why does it feel so boring at times?

I don’t want to disgruntle the fanbase of Joy Division and want to make it clear that I have no desire to put down this remarkable legend. I just feel that the film would’ve been much better with a more interesting take on Ian Curtis’ lifestyle that draws in those who don’t even know the guy. This is where director Anton Corbijn and screenwriter Matt Greenhalgh stepped into a rut.

This gloominess has some serious hang-time and the film in general doesn’t seem to have anything genuinely important to say; it’s an unpleasant and dark film devoid of joy.

This punk rock music isn’t my cup of tea either, which doesn’t help at all. Joy Division’s songs all start off great, but then become flat and gives off a depressing vibe. This is a movie that drains all blithe thoughts from its viewers and leaves them isolated under a muggy rain cloud of sorrow. You can skip this film and still live a perfectly happy life. 2/5 stars

Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Written by: Andrew Stanton
Directed by: Andrew Stanton
Starring: Ben Burtt, Fred Willard, Sigourney Weaver, Jeff Garlin

Pixar has one again delivered a classic, which really, is not a surprise. This, however, does not mean Wall-E isn’t surprising. The film pushes the boundaries of Western mainstream animation with an admirable amount of gusto. What we have here may be the greatest animated film in American history (I, as a critic, can’t help but remain partial to Ratatouille). I’m not certain that by the end of 2008, Wall-E will stand as the best movie of the year, but I’ll bet it’s the most special, and maybe even most important. This is a family movie that doesn’t know it’s a family movie. Yes, it’s rated “G” in the USA and Canada but so was 2001: A Space Odyssey, and I have no problem naming the two films in the same sentence, which in my opinion, is the largest of compliments. It doesn’t need swearing or adult-only themes to work. We have a science fiction story that has a lot to say about where were going, and please do not just write it off as another global warming movie. Yes, global warming and how we treat our planet is the main concern here, but the film is remarkably effective then when you leave the theater, you will notice the first tree or plant you see and be filled with regret. I believe Wall-E to first and foremost be a science fiction film, but that’s certainly not all.

It is roughly 700 years in the future, we left earth some time ago when it became a barren wasteland. The first time we see Wall-E, the one robot left behind to pick up our trash, he is compressing garbage and making gigantic junk piles that resemble skyscrapers. The first time we are presented with the image of earth in this way, Wall-E working away on one of many piles, the title of the film fills the screen. We quickly realize this isn’t the standard kid’s flick. The image is so unexpectedly haunting, definitely one of the most effective visions of our planet’s future. Wall-E appears to be alone on earth except for a cockroach that tends to follow him around. Wall-E should stick to his task, but he has developed a personality, and a winning one at that. He collects objects that peak his interest, such as a Rubik’s cube and a light bulb. The item that has captured his artificial imagination most effectively is a VHS copy of Hello Dolly which he routinely watches. As he watches, two characters on screen hold hands, Wall-E simultaneously interlocks his own robotic hands. He has developed longing. Soon, his simple life is interrupted by the arrival of a spaceship bearing a female robot, EVE, sent to locate some sign of life. Wall-E is at once obsessed and does not leave EVE alone. The unlikeliest of romances begins, and what a memorable one it is. By the end, the strength of the romance is enough to love the picture. Once EVE finds what she needs, she blasts into orbit, Wall-E tags along.

They end up at Axiom, a space station, our advanced civilization. People, it seems, have changed. Everyone is obese and exerts little to no effort in their daily lives. Computers and robots control everything. Even the human man leading the people ultimately answers to a robot (a robot with an ominous red eye much like HAL from 2001, an homage to a great inspiration but perhaps even an equal) No one walks anymore, they float around in chairs with a projected TV screen. They have forgotten how to live. The poignancy only increases. I could keep going on about the brilliant vision of the future but to be surprised is better.

I mentioned that Wall-E primarily works as Sci-Fi, and secondly as a romance, thirdly comes comedy. I don’t know if I could go as far as to actually call it a comedy, but there are hearty laughs abound. Wall-E’s curiosity is charming and often leads to a pleasantly hard to predict and hilarious result. The gags should please the young, old, and in between alike, but I’m not quite sure how young kids will react to this movie as a whole.

The opening 30 minutes is practically dialog free. We eventually gain some minor human characters who speak a little, but speech is very minimal nonetheless. The visuals are stunning and captivating, and in the right mood, a young child may be engrossed. I wouldn’t be surprised though, if a child might fidget and lose interest, at least for part of it. The more patient, thoughtful viewer will be in paradise the entire time.

Andrew Stanton (Finding Nemo) has crafted a masterpiece. An animated film that is not afraid to please adults first. Filled with dark undertones as well as a large dose of hope, one can experience a range of emotions during Wall-E. I was moved and haunted to an extent few movies can accomplish. Pixar has really outdone themselves by bringing us an American animated movie as thoughtful as a Miyazaki film (Spirited Away, Princess Mononoke), to me that is the highest of accolades. Wall-E is, without a doubt, one of the greatest animated films of all time and perhaps one of the best Sci-Fi films as well. Go see Wall-E, it’s flawless.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Get Smart stars Steve Carell, Anne Hathaway, and Dwayne “the rock” Johnson.  It is rated PG-13 for some language, sexual scenes, and mild violence.  It is an hour and forty minutes long. 

Based on a popular television show from the 1960’s from the creative genius of Mel Brooks, a somewhat updates version, this is full of action, laughs and some sexy scenes.  Steve Carell plays Maxwell Smart, otherwise known as agent 86.  Starting off as an analyst, Max has failed the Agent test so many times he is on his last leg, and if he fails again he will remain an analyst forever.  Due to KAOS agents, the enemy, he finds himself an agent, an agent with no field experience up against bloodthirsty goons.  Anne Hathaway plays agent 99, a hot little number who does all the work and yet somehow remains girlie and feminine.  “The Rock” plays agent 23, the agent all other agents dream about and dream to be.  This movie follows the agents as they try to stop KAOS, and find the leak in their own group.  Who wants them dead?  Who is behind the plan to rule the world?  Who is agent 99 really?

Fun and funny this movie was really enjoyable.  I laughed out loud several times during this film.  I already knew Steve Carell was funny, but I learned that the rest of the cast could be pretty funny as well.  There is one scene on a dance floor that I loved, and thought not only was it funny, but it gave bigger girls and boys the upper hand.  Knowing that this was a comedic action movie, I was surprised at some of the action scenes.  They were pretty well played out and didn’t make me cringe as they tried adding comedy and action together. 

My biggest problem with this movie was the character of Agent 99.  Anne Hathaway played her really well, but the back and forth between super agent and girlie girl bothered me.  I was happy to see a strong agent and a girl who wanted love, but the ups and downs of this were too much for me.  It was too much of one or the other and not enough blending which could have been done without harming the integrity of the character.

You don’t have to have seen the old television show to have fun and enjoy this movie, I am sure it might help understand the characters a little better, but honestly I have never watched and episode and I enjoyed the movie.  If you want a fun comedy I suggest seeing this movie.  It was fun, and funny, and even had a little sex appeal for those out there who need that.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Directed by: Louis Leterrier
Written by: Zak Penn & Edward Harrison
Starring: Edward Norton, Tim Roth, Liv Tyler, William Hurt

Marvel Studios has provided another successful film with their sophomore entry. Not nearly as good as Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk nonetheless provides quite a bit of fun just in time for the summer season. There are some problems, though.

For starters, Bruce Banner is way more interesting than The Hulk. With Iron Man, Tony Stark puts on a suit but nothing else really changes. The Hulk, is a dim-witted, mute, mini Godzilla. Every time Banner got green, I was very anxious to get back to the real man. One of the reasons for that is Edward Norton, who is excellent in this role. He brings depth to a character somewhat lacking depth. Every time, the real human is swapped for a ridiculous CG beast, I’m taken right out of the movie. In fact, the Hulkless first twenty minutes is the highlight of the movie.

The other performers are hit and miss. William Hurt is a bit dull as General Ross, the man who wants to use Bruce Banner’s unique problem as a means to advance military prowess. With the power of the Hulk harnessed, I suppose he would make super soldiers or some such nonsense. Liv Tyler is the general’s daughter and the love interest. Her performance is pretty average and contributes very little to the proceedings. Worse yet, she shares no on-screen chemistry with Norton (unlike Downey Jr. and Paltrow in Iron Man). Tim Roth plays the power-hungry Emil Blonsky with a welcomed fierceness. Unfortunately, he’s shorted as far as lines go, but he makes superb usage out of his material.

The writing is only average, and the direction is nothing special. The action sequences are sleep-inducing. I caught my mind wandering numerous times during the final battle. We’re expected to buy into the Marvel universe, and for the most part, I do. But how can I when I’m watching two lifeless cartoons duke it out. Either CGI needs to advance quickly or Marvel needs to take a cue from Guillermo Del Toro (Hellboy, Pan’s Labyrinth) and go for outstanding makeup and costumes with subtle CG effects. I don’t see how that’s too much to ask. I’m starting to complain too much…

The fact is, this movie is very fun, more so at first than during the climax, yes, but it’s a worthwhile experience. Edward Norton adds credibility, even if he doesn’t blow us away like Robert Downey Jr. did oh so recently. The story is OK and a fun surprise appearance in the final scene makes things more interesting. Marvel Studios are off to a good start but they need to keep delivering, preferably at the level that Iron Man did. The Incredible Hulk is good, but if not for all the excitement surrounding Marvel right now, it might have been forgettable.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

Thomas Cavanagh stars in this movie along with a lot of other people who have pretty much played character actors.  The version I watched was unrated and have to warn those about gore, violence and sexual references and scenes.  Run time is one hour fifty-three minutes long.

A man checks into the hospital for a routine colonoscopy the day after his fourtieth birthday.  George (played by Cavanagh) finds out that in this hospital things are far from routine.  A mistake leads to some extraordinary visits and happenings.  Doctors apologize for the accident, and the things that happen because of it.  George finds out things that he never knew, like who his daughter is in love with and that his wife may or may not be cheating on him.  A nurse finds that she has an interest in him, and a black nurse stalks him, promising him things that no one has ever promised before.  This routine colonoscopy becomes a road to self-discovery, and George soon finds out how much pain and pleasure a man can take.  Plus he answers the question, if you die in your dreams, do you die in real life.

This movie takes place pretty much in one room, and one house.  It has several confusing flashbacks, some of which are strange and beautiful at the same time.  Not all of them make sense.  The scenery at times is all over the place, grotesque on minute and achingly beautiful the next.  The nurse that feels sorry for what happened to George is beautiful and is continually portrayed as an innocent beauty of sorts.  Picture wise this movie is interesting to watch.

On the other hand this movie is so strange I wasn’t sure what the heck it was really about, and after I watched it I was left scratching my head, and wishing I could scratch out my eyeballs.  There seems to be very little plot in this movie and a lot of the scenes either don’t make sense, or don’t move this movie along.  Scenes which don’t move a movie along are pretty much useless and shoudn’t be used or created.  The acting of most of the characters was subpar, although I enjoyed Lola and the black nurse Mondango.  Their charactrers were interesting enough that I contined to watch this movie. 

Honestly I don’t reccomend this movie to anyone, unless of course you want to watch an incredibly off the wall flick.  Although some of the imagry or scenes are very striking, it doesn’t make it worth the time wasted watching the rest of the movie.  Please, save some time in your life, watch a different movie.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

“Kung Fu Panda” stars Jack Black, Dustin Hauffman, Angelina Jolie, Jackie Chan, Ian McShane, Seth Rogen, Lucy Liu, and David Cross. It’s directed by Mark Osborne and Glenn Berger.

Po the Panda (Jack Black) is a shiftless and bovine character who’s dream is to become a kung fu master. Although he has an eating problem and seems like the most unlikely being to become “The Dragon Warrior”, he is picked by a wise turtle named Oogway. This leads Po the Panda on his quest to fulfill his dream and possibly learn how to like himself.

The wonderful background colors congruent to Chinese paintings, vivid characters with exuberant personalities, and the focused animation lead me to believe that this is the best animated film I have seen in a couple of years. Jack Black, the clown of epic proportions, shines with his cardinal charisma and extravagant voice. The rest of the cast have such an inobtrusive yet reigning approach to their characters, that their voices are nearly unrecognizable.

Like every other animated film, the story is familiar and has that moral that is either touching or insipid depending on ones point of view. Not to mention the ending is predictable. But these are things that only cynics will dwell on and kids wont even heed these problems. It has some of the best fist-to-fist action I have seen in a while and tops it off with consistent humor from the cumbersome Panda Po. Adults will laugh and the kids will be ecstatic leaving the theater. The top-notch 2D animation at the beginning of the film is impressive and the 3D animation is just as potent.

“Kung Fu Panda” is sure to be nominated for best animated picture of the year. This is more of a homage to great karate flicks like “The Karate Kid” rather than being a cliché. A tribute rather than a trite expression. This lovable and adorable Panda might spawn a sequel and become the next big animated trilogy and I wouldn’t be surprised one bit. 4.5/5 stars

Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com, where you get compensated for your reviews.

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.

“You Don’t Mess With the Zohan” stars Adam Sandler, Emmanuelle Chriqui, John Turturro, and co-stars Nick Swardson and Rob Schneider. It’s directed by Dennis Dugan (Happy Gilmore, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry), and written by Adam Sandler, Robert Smigel, and Judd Apatow.

An Israeli counter-terrorist who genuinely goes by The Zohan (Adam Sandler) fakes his death in order to fulfill his dream to “make the world silky smooth”. He becomes Scrappy Coco, a sex-craved hairstylist who attracts women of all age. But once his identity is discovered, he is determined not to fall back into the world of crime and destruction.

The Zohan is certainly a funny character, performing crass antics and displaying his bulging bottom-half to the elderly. These characteristics that make up the outrageous individual seem to be the funniest moments in his latest film. The aiding cast is composed of lifeless characters with unfunny lines pertaining to goats and neosporin. I think that there might have been initial awkwardness between Judd Apatow and Adam Sandler, being that this is their first time making a film together.

Adam Sandler needed a more subordinate supporting cast in this one. Every scene absent of his protuberant crotch and disco movements relied on some sort of humorous line-reading from a corroborative cast, all of which fell flat. These barren jokes don’t go as well as they were intended to and become repetitive and tired. The Zohan character is a romp and adds to Sandler’s line of “funny” characters, but one funny character can’t save the entirety of a film. Earning a very mature PG-13 rating for the outrageously crude humor, this is one that you steer your children far from and tend to a more family friendly outing.

Unlike Adam Sandler’s previous work, this one lacks even the smallest of heart. This might be the result of the collaboration of Apatow and Sandler. If so, lets hope their next attempt at synergy will be more pleasing than this one. Not to say that I didn’t enjoy myself, I was just expecting more from the SNL affiliate who created Canteen Boy and Opera Man. The accent, the antics, and the look of Zohan assist this one-schtick comedy, saving it from being the first unfunny Sandler guided film and making it an addition to the sporadically funny Sandler guided films. 2.5/5 stars

 Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com

The above author's byline must be attached to the work if being distributed.