The movie stars Malcolm McDowell and Sheri Moon Zombie (of course).  It was directed by Rob Zombie, who should have stuck with the Devil’s Rejects and House of 1,000 Corpses type of horror.  This movie was rated R, although I think it should have been rated S for either stupid or slow.

 This movie is a remake of John Carpenter’s 1978 horror thriller, which I thought was a lot better than this one.  In the current movie a young boy, Michael Meyers, murders his sister, her boyfriend and his step-father (or mother’s live in boyfriend, not sure).  Mike does this all at the tender age of 10.  He is sent to a mental institution under the care of a child Psychologist (McDowell) and his Mother (Sheri Moon Zombie).  Fifteen years later he escapes and is back out to finish his murderous spree, and to search for the baby sister he loved and let live. 

This movie was no where near as great as the original movie, and it is really too bad that John Carpenter allowed this remake be made.  While I did enjoy Rob Zombie’s House of 1,000 Corpses and really enjoyed his The Devil’s Rejects, I thought that this movie was a poor substitute and a poor attempt at a horror.  It didn’t even fit into the gore horror genre.  The beginning was too slow, we spend at least half of the movie watching Sheri Moon Zombie yell, curse, and cry over her child.  Most of the movie was spent developing the back story of Michael Meyers, trying to tell us why he becomes a serial killer, a bad abusive home and he likes to kill animals.  This was all wasted time, he’s a serial killer, there is no need to try and explain why or how he becomes that way.

When we finally get to the killing spree it is unimaginitive and slow, although Rob Zombie did try to remake scenes from the original.  The scene where one of the boys wears a sheet to attpemt to scare his girlfriend was right out of the original, but it was poorly remade.  In fact the viewer sees less of the actual acts of violence and more of the blood that comes with the aftermath.  While this movie claims to be a horror film, it didn’t have one scary moment, even when Michael Meyers is searching for the grown up sister by pounding into wall.  As a horror movie junkie I was sorely dissappointed and wished I waited for it to come out on DVD rather than waste my money on it at the theater. 

If you are a horror movie fan, I don’t reccommend this version, watch the original.  If you are a fan of gore horror you might like this, but I suggest you just watch one of the Saw movies or Hostel again.

This movie is rated PG-13, and has the same people who voice the television show.  This movie is an hour and 45 minutes long, which I have to say was much too long.

The plot of the movie is that the Simpsons that Homer Simpson once again screw things up in a destructive manner and almost wipes Sprigfield off of the map, the invisible map.

If you like the Simpsons and have watched all sixteen years of it, then this movie is for you.  The humor is the same as the television show, and the character of the pig is the most interesting character in the movie.  Green Day and Tom Hanks make special voice apperances, but I kind of hoped that there would be more celebrity voices, since this is the movie.  It had all of the same stories as the show, homer screws up, marge gets mad, then she forgives him.

I thought that this movie was a tad long, and not as funny as it could have been.  If you want to see a long version of a Simpsons Episode then go see this movie.  If you want to hear Maggie’s like 5th word, go see this movie.  If you want to see Lisa fall in love with with another nerd, go see this movie. 

If you are into cartoon nudity, go see this movie.  Otherwise, forget it, wait for the three episodes to come out on TV.  Not worth the time.

This movie is rated PG and stars Catherine Zeta-Jones and Aaron Eckhart. 

This movie is about a woman who is the head chef at a fancy restaurant.  Her sister dies leaving her daughter to Kate (Catherine’s character).  As all this goes on a new sous chef is hired because the old one is having a baby.  The new sous chef is not what Kate was looking for and was chosen without her approval, which leads to some harsh moments between all involved.

 I thought that this was a sweet movie, as far as a romance goes.  It was based on a book and an original movie named Mostly Martha, which according to other reviewers was better than this version.  The child actress is very good as a child, her acting is heartwarming.  Some of the acting done by her, Catherine and Aaron is a little over the top, and unbelievable. 

I think as a romance this movie is okay.  It has the kissing and the girl getting the guy, but the story is somewhat boring, and in the end you are wondering why you watched the movie.  There is a lot of information given in the movie, like Kate’s mother died when she and her sister was young and yet she doesn’t have to go into it during therapy.  The writer and director cut all of the interesting information off leaving us with crumbs that are not tasty at all.

I felt this movie was too dull.  It had it’s good parts but they were so few and in between that they didn’t make up for the dullness of this film.  It interested in watching it I hope you are only watching it for the attractiveness of Catherine Zeta-Jones, and not the horrible story.

This movie is a remake of John Waters original Hairspray, and is far less sufficient.  It stars John Travolta (Divine was way better) as Tracy’s Mother, Christopher Walken (whose talent is wasted in this movie) as Tracy’s father, and also has Jerry Stiller, John Waters, Amanda Bynes, and Michelle Pheifer.  It is approximately two hours long.

The plot of this movie is about a girl who wants to be on the most popular dance show in Baltimore, the Corny Collins Show.  She dances and sings, well the whole cast of the  movie sings, and is very musically oriented.  Segregation comes into play when Negro Day at the Corny Collins Show is canceled, then the movie become about integration and love. 

The original Hairspray movie was much better than this one.  The use of John Waters as a flasher in the into was humorous, but a waste.  Also Jerry Stiller and Ricky Lake had appearances, but Ricky Lake had no lines, and Jerry Stillers appearance was somewhat dull and trite.  Casting John Travolta as Edna Turnblad was a horrible casting decision, and he was not believable sine the entire movie he was smiling.

If you like songs with a lot of singing watch this movie.  The singing seemed to be nonstop, and towards the end I found it incredibly annoying.  I mean how many times does a girl have to sing about how she is in love.  Some of the jokes were funny, but also over the heads of most 9-13 year old girls (which to me would seem to be the biggest audience).  This movie was entirely miscast, and I was disappointed in it (the original is one of my favorite movies). 

I don’t recommend it to anyone, well that’s not true, if you are a fan of Amanda Bynes or have a teenage crush on any of the boys, go see this, otherwise skip it, rent the original by John Waters, and have a laugh.

This movie stars the cast of usual characters, Daniel Radcliff as Harry Potter, Gary Oldman as Sirius Black, and some new editions which are to thrilling to tell.  Let’s see if you can recognize them.  It is rated PG-13 and is 133 minutes long. 

Most people who go to see this movie have seen the first ones as well.  So I don’t think you need much back story, but I will give you a little.  Harry Potter is a magician who goes to a special school for magicians (or witches whatever you want to call them).  This is like a junior and senior high school for magical children.  His parents were murdered by a fiend named Voldimort.  V is a very bad guy who wants to rule the magical world.  Harry has gone through many trials to get to this point and has done a lot of growing and some losing.  This chapter of the story finds Harry butting heads with the Ministry.  Not just him but all of Hogwarts (the magical school).  The beginning of the movie starts with people not believing that Voldimort is back.  Harry has to continually prove himself and that what he said was true.  The ministry on the other hand has a difference of opinion and send a special teacher to get things under control.  Harry must prove that Voldimort is alive, but he has no idea how.  Through some unsurprising twists and some surprising ones we find the truth, not just about Harry, and we get a hint of how this series will be ending.  Loss.

This movie seemed to dwell more on the feelings of Harry than the other movies.  There is not a lot of character set up which is refreshing.  We don’t have to go through a lot of new knowledge, but we also don’t get as much information as we probably could.  The Order of the Phoenix was not really injected as much as I thought it should be, since this movie is called Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.  This is a very dark movie and young children might be frightened or unable to understand what has been going on.

Personally I enjoyed the character of Sirius Black and have been a fan of Gary Oldman since The Professional and Dracula and I was dissapointed that he was not used more as he almost always bring his whole self into the character.  There are a couple of characters that I am sure we will be seeing again, hopefully those actors/actresses will be used in accordance with their abilities.

I enjoyed this movie, even though unlike most viewers I have not read on of the books.  I think if you have kept up with the movie it is not necessary to read the books, but if you feel the need I am sure that there is information in them that is not in the movies.  I would say go see this if you want something dark and brooding.  This is not a light movie and you may leave it with a little darker mood.

This is the sequel to the movie Resident Evil.  Both are based a video game of the same name.  This movie stars Mila Jovovich.  It is rated R for what it calls non-stop violence (I haven’t seen that before), and language.  It is a hour and 34 minutes long. 

 If you saw the first one, Resident Evil, you have an idea of what is going on in this movie.   If you haven’t watched the first one quick update - Alice (MJ) works for a company that has made a way to change/mutate DNA.  That liquid miracle (the T-Virus) got out, killed a bunch of people and made dogs and people into zombies.  Alice and one other person was saved.  That was the end.  This movie begins with Alice waking up and finding herself in a room.  The doctors have been studying her and she is alone.  She has been changed but at the beginning of the movie she is unsure about all that.  The town aurrounding her is being quarentened.  People who are trying to escape are being murdered.  Zombies are once again free.  Alice and a team of survivors attempt to leave, and find a way out.  A little girl who holds the key and the answer. 

This movie is faster paced than the first movie, but not by much.  There are more zombies, more fighting, and more blood and gore.  The fighting sequences are intense, and they are also exciting.  I felt myself holding my breath waiting to see who would win each fight.  Some were believable, and others were not totally, but you can understand how Alice can run and jump and fight so well.  She too realizes she has been changed somehow.

I only wish that the movie didn’t have to end with the other survivor from the first movie becomming a monster and fighting Alice to the death.  At least one death on the movie is not as satisfying, but then again there is one death towards the end of the movie that makes you want to scream “YES”.

The movie ends with another lead in to another sequel.  That movie will be coming out this fall, it’s entitled Resident Evil: Extinction.  I think if you play the video game, this goes beyond the game, so you might think you are watching one movie, and realize you are watching another.  Don’t be disappointed.  I look forward to watching the next movie, I’d like to know if Alice is good or zombie.

I put Resident Evil in the Horror category because it belongs there more than any other, although in reality it belongs in Science Fiction.  This movie stars Mila Jovovich and Michelle Rodriguez.  It is rated R mostly for violence and language.  It is an hour and 41 minutes. 

This movie is about a woman named Alice who works for this company which is working to evolve DNA and genetics.  Somehow a sample is released into the air and it kills all who are in the office, which is actually an underground station.  The station seals off and Alice finds herself in the midst of Zombies and mutant dogs who want to kill and eat her.  Alice herself works in the company, but her memory has been altered and she hasn’t a clue what the heck happened.

This movie is pretty intense.  The action scenes are fast paced and thrilling.  The effects are great, and you believe that the attack dogs are undead.  The character of Alice is fun and really makes you interested in seeing her story through to the end.  As a sci-fi movie this deals a lot with DNA and changing the genetic code, and as a horror movie this has enough zombies and gore to satisfy.  The story holds itself and the end screams sequel.  Even the love between Alice and the brother of a worker makes some sense.

The problem with this movie is that it so obviously set up the sequel.  I am all for sequels on movies that are character driven, because people want more of that one character, so good for them.  Yet, it was so obvious that this was going to have a sequel.  Which it does In Resident Evil: Apocalypse. 

Sci-fi fans and horror fans will both enjoy this movie.  Especially with the resergance of the zombie genre, I think this movie has a place today. 

This movie is rated PG-13.  It stars Josh Hartnett, Matthew Lillard, and Jessica Pare.  I have it in Thrillers but honestly I think it might be more for Romantic Drama. 

This movie is about a guy, Matthew who gets his heart broken and has moved on.  Two years after his heartbreak he has met another woman and has decided to propose to her.  Things go a little hay wire when he thinks he sees the girl who broke his heart, Lisa, in a restaurant.  He goes in search of her, wanting to know why she stopped the relationship.  Little does he know something sinister has happened to cause Lisa to stop communication with him.  The twist unfolds slowly and makes you wonder who is telling the truth, and who is Lisa.

I rented this movie because at first it had been advertised in the genre of Horror, and felt misled by the fact that it was not a horror movie at all, but more of a romantic drama or romantic thriller.  So I was a little bummed as I don’t watch a lot of romance.  I like blood and gore, this movie had none.  However it did have an interesting plot twist that made me watch it with more zeal.  The four main characters are quite interesting and I was especially interested in Matthew Lillard’s character because I felt he was going to be the one who ended this movie worst off, and I was right, somewhat.  Also the ending of this movie gave me chills, of course that might have been the Coldplay song in the background.

The main problem that I had with this movie was that it was a little slow and at times I was not really interested.  There was one character in the movie that I wasn’t sure if he had been described well or if he was an unresolved plot twist.  That character was Daniel, and I wasn’t sure if he really was a stalker or if he was just a boyfriend who had just been broken up with.  So I was a little perturbed by his character.

I would reccomend this movie to anyone who likes romance, where everyone (pretty much) ends up happily at the end.  There are some unhappily ever afters, but the one that counts is satisfying.  I liked it more than I thought it would, but stick to it basically if you want romance with a “thriller” twist.  It isn’t horror, so please don’t be confused.

This movie is rated R and stars Keri Russell, Nathan Fillion, and Adrienne Shelly.  It was also written and directed by Adrienne Shelly.  Shelly, who was murdered, before this movie was released would have been proud. 

This movie is about a waitress (Keri Russell) who works in a small town diner famous for it’s pies.  Pies she often comes up with.  Pies with uniques names like “Damn Baby” pie and “I don’t want Earls baby” pie.  Her husband, Earl, is a control freak who controls their money, comings and goings, and basically everything but what she wears, although I am sure he has some imput into that as well.  When she finds out she is pregnant with his baby she is very upset, and goes to the gyno telling him that she is not happy and doesn’t want the baby.  She ends up having an affair with the doctor, who is also married.

I liked that most of the humor in this movie was soft, not overt and in your face.  Also it didn’t go into “potty” humor, which was a nice change.  The names of all of the pies she thinks of when she is daydreaming about what her like shoudl be like. 

The movie was a little slow, and some of the scenes with Earl were a little odd.  I would have like to see a little more between the married two.  Also I would have liked a little mor ein the backstory of the other characters in the movie.  The ending of the movie dissapointed me a little bit because it was predictable.  I was happy to see one surprise twist between Keri Russells character and Nick Fillions, and I think most people will enjoy it. 

Of course going into the movie knowing that Adrienne Shelly was murdered put a little more meaning in the movie.  She was a great actress and a pretty good director and storyteller. 

I recommend this movie to anyone having a first date, or a guy who has done something stupid and needs to make it up to his girl.  Of course if you did that you might want to take flowers too, or maybe a pie.

This movie stars Shia Lebeof (holes) and Josh Dummel (TV Show Las Vegas).  It is rated PG-13 and is 144 minutes long.  The movie is a lot like the old television cartoon, yet there are many ways that it is not like the cartoon. 

The plot of this movie is basically that there are these cars, planes, tanks, and the such that come to life and are alien robots.  They have come to earth in search of a cube which creates other alien robots.  Of course there is good and evil, and the good don’t believe that humans should be hurt, while the evil side believes that humans are not usefull at all.

I really enjoyed the humor in this movie.  There is a part when a robot opens his gas can and “urinates” on a human.  It was totally hilarious, also the parents of Shia Lebeofs character are very funny asking his character if he needs his privacy because he is “masterbating”. 

The main problem with this movie was that the robots changes from cars (or whatever they were) into robots way too quickly, and a lot of the action sequences were very fast paced and some scenes were a little too unrecognizable.  I mean if you can’t follow the action what is the point of watching an action movie? 

If you are or were a transformers fan some of the small things will bother you.  Bumblebee was a yellow camero in the movie, but in the cartoons I grew up on he was a yellow bug.  Little things like that might bother you, but otherwise this was a fun movie, with a lot of fun action.  Also it was just a little too long, but you don’t really notice it until almost the end of the movie. 

I suggest that if you are a fan of action or the transformers go see this movie.  If you aren’t a fan go see the movie anyway, it might just make you a fan, plus it was excellent fun!

This is a horror movie that stars American Pie’s Shannon Elizabeth and Monk’s Tony Shalhoub (or if you prefer Men In Black’s).  It’s rated R mostly for gore/violence and nudity. 

 Basically this movie is about a family, who are in dire circumstances since the mother dies in a house fire, and get a stroke of good luck.  The Uncle that they never knew left them an amazing house.  The secret to this house is that it is a porthole, actually it is a key to release great evil and power.

I liked this movie because the plot was an original.  I have watched a lot of horror movies and have yet to see another one where the ghosts are trapped or kept imprisoned, for the purpose of helping a man get more power.  The makeup is a little gory and the storylines of each ghost has been developed a little, but not quite enough for my mind.  I wanted a little background on some of them since almost all of them seemed to have evil intentions. 

My main problem with this movie was the ending.  I felt it dropped a little off of the deep end with the end and I was a little dissapointed in one of the characters since they seemed so strong and yet they ended up dying so stupidly, and no it it not the character played by Matthew Lillard (of Scooby Doo Fame). 

This movie does not really follow the original Thirteen Ghosts movie, and has enough of a twist  and enough gore and violence for today’s audience.  I am fascinated by the idea of the ghosts and don’t really care much about the characters in this movie, which may say they aren’t that interesting.  They are, but the ghosts are a little more so. 

 If you like gory movies and like seeing the brests of dead women, I suggest this movie.  If you want to be scared and watch a lot of horror, don’t see this movie, it wasn’t really that scary.  At least not to me.  If you want a scary movie watch Session 9.  That movie creeped me out.

This movie stars lindsey Lohan, and makes you realize why she might be in rehab.  It is rated R, but I think it is mostly for gore and violence. 

This movie is about a woman who is abducted by a serial killer and is tortured.  The serial killer has abducted at least on other woman and the signs of torture were obvious to everyone as she was found without a leg.

I thought this movie was a little too violent for absolutly no reason.  There is one scene where the killer has set a block of ice on Linsey Lohans hand for a long period of time.  The scene shows as he pulls the ice off of her hand he takes a large chunk of her skin with it, then he cuts off her finger.  It goes way too into the gore if it than it needs too.

I also had a big problem with the direction of the scenes.  A lot of the scenes you asked yourself what the heck it was about.  It kept showing scenes of Lindsay in the hospital and then flashbacks to this incredible violence.  Yes, I have watched Nightmare on Elm Street and Hostile, but the violence in those had a point, and weren’t all about grossing the audience out.  There were scenes in this movie that seemed just intended to make the audience uncomfortable, and they didn’t really add to the story.

I wouldn’t recommend this story for anyone.  It was a waste of my time, and It was one time when I wish that I could use a time machine to go back into time and not go to this movie.  I would have rather poked my eyes out than seen this movie.  Lindsey Lohan is a horrible actress, and this movie just proved why.

Stardust stars Claire Danes, Michelle Pheifer, and Robert DiNero.  It is in a little bit of camoflauge, as it looks like a children’s movie, but in reality it isn’t.  It is more of a fantasy/comedy movie.  The setting is in older days, but it is also a fantasy so it isn’t really set in reality and has some mysticism in it. This movie is rated PG-13, so don’t think of taking your little 7 year olds.  In fact I don’t suggest taking anyone younger than 10.  I wouldn’t want to have to explain why a male character is wearing a dress. 

In the realm of fantasy it is a pretty good movie.  It had all you could ask for, witches, romance, sword fights, and a hint of homosexuality.   There was at least one very interesting swordfight, and one moment of magical intervention that was quite fun.  There are several scenes of death and dying, which might be too intense for younger viewers, so I don’t suggest bring anyone young, again.  Michelle Phiefers character is a lot of fun, and does many things with magic that she shouldn’t.  all of this action is to save or kill the star, played by Claire Danes.

 A lot of the movie gave of a little bit of humor, actually a lot of humor.  There was one scene which inviolved a king and four of his sons, which will make you laugh and look at your own siblings in a different light, especially if you have parents that will be leaving you somthing. 

The movie also started off very slowly, and some of the beginning was a little pointless.  We didn’t really need to see all of the parts with Tristin (the main character), trying to woo the girl who doesn’t want him.  Some of those could have either been cut out or shortened.  And some scenes were a little long, and could have been edited a little more.

All in all this was afun movie, and it had you guessing what was going to happen with the star, almost until the very end of the movie.  I would recommend it to anyone over the age of 12.  Although my 10 year old sister liked it, she didn’t understand some of the sexual references, and I for one did not want to have to explain it to her.  It is a fun little romp, and not too long.