Jet Li has made some really remarkable films and it is sad to say that Tai Chi Master is not one of them. It’s silly, pretentious, and utterly appalling.

Junbao (Jet Li) and Chin Bo (Siu-hou Chin) have grown up together teaching each other masterful techniques deadly to their opponents. But after they both get kicked out of the Shaolin temple, Chin Bo betrays Junbao for money from the government of China and becomes a ruthless killer.

I am in complete awe at how bad this movie really is. Before getting to anything worthwhile, poorly rendered subtitles rapidly flood the screen in a manner so fast any average person would have to pause the DVD to read them, and three prolonged fight sequences of ridiculous kung fu antics will have eyeballs rolling. It becomes very frustrating within a few minutes. Tai Chi Master is the worst Dragon Dynasty picture I have seen, the worst Jet Li movie I have ever seen, and a top contender for the worst kung fu movie I have ever seen.

Having complete respect for Jet Li’s remarkable talent, this film avoids exploiting them in a manner that is agreeable to some extent. Instead, Director Woo-Ping Yuen creates some of the most unintentionally funny and outrageously stupid moments in the history of kung fu cinema. This is a film that begins idiotic, becomes moronic halfway through, and ends up being preposterous in the finale.

It’s incredible to be able to have such coordination to execute some of these antics and I admire that. However the film is never beautiful, rarely enjoyable, and constantly frustrating. The whole DVD is a mess. The subtitles are too fast to read and if you listen to the dubbed version of the film, the characters say something completely different from the subtitles. I just don’t get it.

I was expecting something similar to Iron Monkey or Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. This is nowhere near as good-looking nor is it anywhere near as astonishing as those films. It irks me that Jet Li agreed to make such a sloppy film.

It’s nearly unwatchable, thanks to the rapid fire of incoherent subtitles and the torrent of stupidness that makes up the entire movie. It is best to save your money and keep your distance from this messy, poorly structured DVD.

Looking for a romantic comedy that appeals to a broad audience; a film that never goes overboard with stereotypes and profanity? Outsourced just might be the perfect movie for you. The DVD is set to be released on September 2, 2008.

Todd Anderson (John Hamilton) is living a fine life until he receives the bad news that his job has been outsourced, meaning that the company is to send out work to an outside provider in order to cut costs. Even worse is the fact that Todd must travel to India to train his replacement. There he learns about the history of India, the cultural dos and don’ts, and finds true love along the way.

Outsourced is an exotic charmer filled with endearing characters and genuinely funny moments, a film that doesn’t rush into the romance and is never mawkish or overly sentimental. It perfectly mixes charm and humor with some truly fascinating insights on Indian culture mixed in. I was surprised that this film had so much to say about India. Although the majority of these things seem, well, unsanitary, the film also has some interesting lessons pertaining to Indian goddesses and bindis.

It stamped a smile on my face from beginning to end by using relatable incidents similar to those one might encounter while spending time in a country with a non-western culture. There are certain rules you must follow. Eating the right foods is a must (as this film so humorously demonstrates) and is quite possibly the most important rule upon further examination of the film.

The acting was also a pleasant surprise. The cast, both American and Indian, fit the roles perfectly and show some acting skills along with sharp comedic timing. John Hamilton’s Todd Anderson reacts exactly as one would when encountering a cow in his office and Ayesha Dharker’s Asha has moments that are touching. The mishaps that Todd encounters and finds solutions to are quite funny and the relationship between Todd and Asha is remarkably honest. The two have great chemistry.

Outsourced is a clever, sweet, and surprisingly hilarious movie that uses lighthearted humor and charm to win over just about anyone in need of a carefree movie experience. The combination of likable characters, modest humor, and a cute love story make for a purely enjoyable romantic comedy. With more comedy than romance, the film easily overcomes being predicable and cliched. Director John Jeffcoat has a fondness for his characters and simply guides them in the right direction every step of the way. Not only is it a hugely enjoyable film, but also a beautifully rendered love story.

The DVD’s special features include “Behind the Scenes”, a music video, an audio commentary track, an interview with director John Jeffcoat, a theatrical trailer, and a storyboard feature. 4.5/5 stars

Another painfully annoying Martin Lawrence movie or finally a refreshing Martin Lawrence comedy? Actually, it’s a combination of the two.

Chief of Police James Porter (Martin Lawrence) is a father devoted to spending every lasting moment with his little daughter Melanie (Raven-Symoné). He starts to worry, and the movie begins in earnest, when Melanie plans on going across the country to find the perfect college. James’s plan is to get her to go to the closest college possible, exactly 28 minutes away from her home. However, his plan isn’t as easy as he thought it would be.

Yep, it does have a couple lame jokes, a few annoying characters, and some unnecessary sing-alongs, all of which make up some of the worst moments in the film. Fortunately, we have twice as many laugh-out-loud moments, a few heartwarming incidents, and that adorable pig Albert, which combine to make more than a few bright spots in this G-rated film. It’s a hit-and-miss family comedy.

It’s predictable, yet fluffy and clean family entertainment. It’s perfect for the family in the fact that nothing is vile and it still manages to make adults laugh, or, at the very least, smile. Much of those laughs or smiles come thanks to the comedic duo that is Albert the Pig and Martin Lawrence. The two managed to make me crack up quite a few times. And all the laughs are true, never forced.

As for the supporting cast, they didn’t bring the comedy as much as they brought some headache-inducing duets and solos. If you can get past those moments, you will have a good time. Director Roger Kumble (Cruel Intentions, Cruel Intentions 2, Just Friends) doesn’t top any of his previous films, but he shows moments of good comedic capabilities here and there. It is easy to say that without Donny Osmond and Molly Ephraim (who play another dad-daughter pair out looking at colleges), the overload of overly sentimental moments, and the horrendous singing, this would almost be a highly recommended film.

Clearly this is Disney Channel material with higher production values and a big Hollywood star filling the lead role. It is a film I can recommend for a family with children under the age of 8; the kids will probably find the parts that annoy adults pretty funny. On the other hand, if you’re a critical person and are looking at all aspects of the film, you can’t help but see much of the lame humor that takes place on this College Road Trip. Overall however, there are enough laugh-out-loud moments (which I wasn’t expecting from a G-rated comedy) to make it palatable for a family. Everyone else would be just fine avoiding this one. 2.5/5 stars

The DVD’s special features include the usual gag reel, deleted scenes, alternate opening and endings, and audio commentary tracks.

Andie (Briana Evigan) belongs to the 410 crew. They’re composed of the greatest dancers on the street who frolic around disturbing the peace with their talents. After disputes with the crew leave Andie on her own, she gathers up the school’s most talented misfits to create an impressive dance crew to gain respect.

If you’re familiar with the formula, then you know the outcome. It is nothing new, nor does it try to be. But with the talented cast of stylish dancers, this film exceeds expectations and looks good while doing so. If only the film was all dance moves that tell a story, rather than mixing it with slang terms and preaching right and wrong in the end. All of this is unnecessary and could have been filled in with more dancing.

Energetic, explosive and enthralling dance moves are what entices the viewers and basically makes them forget how predictable and cliched the storyline is. One character in particular really stood out with impeccable dance skills, Moose (Adam G. Sevani), who blew me away in the final dance scene. It is clear that this is all style and no substance. But you know what, I didn’t care and neither should you. The cast is young and good-looking, the characters are gratifying, and the dance scenes are dazzling. It is everything a movie like this needs in order for the viewers to forget all the blemishes.

The acting isn’t always good, but these unknowns look comfortable in front of a camera which lines them up for much broader roles in the future. It’s very predictable and widely cliched, but what else is there to add to such overused material? You will be overwhelmed by the well-choreographed flips, spins and rhythm of each movement.

Everything in between the smooth movements and free-styling galore plays out like another insipid melodrama, complete with romance and violent stir-ups. Director Jon Chu does what he can and makes it work. I highly recommend it for some great set pieces, magnificent tactics in the dancing portions, and an attractive cast that elevate it beyond its overly familiar plot.

The Dance-Off Edition DVD special features that include deleted scenes, music videos, outtakes, Lead Actor Robert Hoffman Video Prank, Outlaws of Hip Hop, and The Making of Step Up 2. 3.5/5 stars

Two sets of half brothers become charged with anger after the death of their father, a man who treated one half of the family with violence and resentment, and the other half with respect and loyalty. The poorly treated half of the Hayes family said a few disrespectful words at their father’s funeral. This commenced a feud between the two families, who then resort to the right to bear arms in order to solve these disputes.

Shotgun Stories forges a righteous path for revenge stories with an important message, which ranks it as last year’s most powerful film. First-time writer/director Jeff Nichols might spark a new wave of American filmmakers with his style and the obvious conviction of his work. It’s tightly edited and marvelously triumphant in its depiction of right and wrong. The casting was done wisely. Although actor Michael Shannon’s character seems one-dimensional until rage hits him, most of the performances are very good at capturing the essence of these individuals. Every performance is dead on.

The film has a very slow pace that centers on developing these characters. The problem is we have characters here that have bullet wounds and are patched up with bandages and we have no insight into where or how these wounds occurred. For example, Son Hayes (Micheal Shannon) has bullet wounds in his back from protecting his brothers. But where, when, and why did this happen? Same goes with Shampoo (G. Alan Wilkins). He has bandages all over himself and we have no recollection as to how this happened. Small things like that deserve to be answered.

It picks up the pace about halfway through and becomes exactly the film I was expecting — a tense, harrowing decent into revenge-fueled hatred. Powerful, important, and very American, the intensity this story has makes it a must-see. The score is ideal for a movie like this, giving off an appropriate vibe. Jeff Nichols has a way of putting a spellbinding trance on us and guides us to the meaningful ending. The PG-13 rating is very appropriate for the violence occurring in America. Everyone should see this film before reaching out for a loaded weapon and maybe they will think about the consequences of revenge and the long-lasting effects it has on people.

Shotgun Stories is the most American film of the year and possibly one that will be remembered for years to come. Jeff Nichols knows what he is doing, and proves it by demonstrating a new kind of justice, one that forgives and forgets instead of descending into brutality. It’s a wake-up call to America. Special features include an audio commentary with director Jeff Nichols, an isolated score track composed and performed by the band Lucero, a photo gallery, and a Shotgun Stories trailer. 4/5 stars

Discovering a worthwhile horror comedy that is released directly to DVD is a gleeful moment for buffs of the genre like myself, and I think I discovered one of the scariest direct-to-DVD horror comedies released in years. The terrifying film Dead and Gone is available on DVD July 1.

Poor Jack Wade. His famous wife is in a coma and they are steadily running low on money. But Jack has an idea — he’ll bring his wife out to an isolated cabin deep in the mountains where he can finally put her body to rest for good and gain the assets he so desperately needs. However, this is the same cabin where a man murdered his family 40 years ago and it is rumored to be built on an Indian burial ground. Now, killing his wife isn’t as easy as he thought it would be.

Harry Shannon’s inaugural screenplay is put into the hands of first-time director Yossi Sasson. The producers and screenwriter evidently trusted this rookie director to bring Shannon’s insane ideas to life. I think it was this trust that elevated this picture and it’s clear that Sasson knew where to go with this concept and how to execute it.

Don’t rent this film expecting full-on horror. Although it does have quite a bit of blood-spewing action, it has its moments of dark humor wedged in. But this is humor so dry you probably will find yourself thinking it’s funny rather than laughing out loud. It gels horror with deadpan comedy very well by not making us burst into laughter. It mostly benefits from flashy imagery and fast motion sequences that polish the look, tighten the atmosphere, and ultimately scare the hell out of the viewers.

Quentin Jones proved his ability to carry a movie, bearing in mind that he was pretty much the highlight of the film. There are a few well done cameo appearances by Kyle Gass from the two-man band Tenacious D and horror regular Zack Ward who first made his appearance as a child actor in the film A Christmas Story as Scut Farcus. These cameo appearances aren’t anything special, but might satisfy the few fans they have. It’s a gooey surprise and a solid debut for both Harry Shannon and Yossi Sasson.

In the vein of The Shining and The Evil Dead, this white knuckle thrill-ride will have you on the edge of your seat from its gripping opening scene to its twisted finale. Hell, you just might fall off your seat. The last 25 minutes of the film are truly frightening and there are enough harrowing twists and turns to maintain the intrigue. It even has a tingling score with a light chuckle tweaked in occasionally. Not only does it have the ability to send chills up the spine, but it will also have you biting your nails down to the core.

Look for it when it hits the rental shelves on July 1 and you can thank me later. DVD special features include the featurette “Gone with the Dead: Behind the Scenes of Dead and Gone“, filmmakers’ commentary with director Yossi Sasson and writer Harry Shannon, deleted scenes, outtakes, and a trailer gallery. 4.5/5 stars

Join Jerry and Mike (Jack Black and Mos Def) in Be Kind Rewind as they “swede” some of the most iconic movies of all time to raise the appropriate amount of money and save their aged video store from being torn down.

What is sweding, one might ask? Sweding is when you remake a film from scratch using whatever you can get your hands on. In this case, Jerry accidentally erases every video tape from the store and Mike comes up with the simple idea of remaking the VHS tapes using themselves as actors. The two end up becoming stars and people from around the country start to seek the sweded work of Jerry and Mike.

The idea is unique and the characters are charming. Jerry is an over-the-top character with sensitive feelings and believes that he is perfect for every role and Mike is a very simple-minded, soft-spoken character who just doesn’t want to disappoint the store owner and father figure Elroy Fletcher, passively played by Danny Glover.

Although the tone of the film is much different from that of Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, there is still a lot of thought put into this picture. And this takes of a whole lot effort from Jack Black and Mos Def if you consider the many different roles they had to cover in the time span of 102 minutes. Let’s not forget about Danny Glover, who has a distinctive slur to his voice and gives an unobtrusive performance that brings some dignity to his character. There are a few funny moments to be found, but the film seemed more interested in capturing the hearts of its viewers, rather piling on the laughs.

A definitive style and imagination is a requirement for a solid concept like this. Michel Gondry proved that he has everything needed to direct films with such an offbeat pitch to it when he put his signature style on films like Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and The Science of Sleep. This one’s a true crowd pleaser.

Unlike Son of Rambow (a film that was also trying to grasp the essence of film and failed on multiple levels), this film has a tender spot for movie lovers and pleases without being disorganized and erratically uneven. A solid script, great cast, and an amusing premise guide this homage to movies, friendship, and the power of numbers to its warm finale. Be sure to take the time to cherish each clever scene and the outer limits of Michel Gondry’s imagination. The ending will either be a touching, heartfelt one or an insipid, whimsical one (depending on one’s perspective). For me, it was entirely endearing.  4/5 stars

Writer/director Richard Linklater (Dazed and Confused, A Scanner Darkly) takes the audience on a psychedelic mind-trip into the world of dreaming. A man wanders around in his own dream meeting various people who preach the meaning and purpose of life and has multiple false awakenings in the process. He begins to question what is real and what is fictional and soon wonders if this is the result of death. The cast includes Wiley Wiggins, Ethan Hawke, Julie Delpy, Adam Goldberg, Steven Soderbergh, and Richard Linklater himself.

It all comes down to what Linklater was trying to accomplish. Whether it’s due to an abundant flow of ideas and theories or just proof that he handled every drug known to man during his college days, Linklater has a way of drawing his audience into his dream world of distorting illusion and conventional conversations pertaining to evolution, the media, and isolation. The majority of these conversations are contrived and just don’t make much sense. But when the occasional well thought out theory is explained thoroughly, one can’t help but dwell on these perspectives and immediately become enmeshed in Linklater’s world of hypothetical analysis.

The animation is trippy. Objects move when they should be stationary and the characters change shape and colors, even becoming transparent at times. It’s an ambitious work of art with an imaginative glance into the world of surrealism, an hypnotic way of explaining one’s perception of dreams and reality. It’s a film for the thinking crowd, the type of movie that will test your knowledge and proclaim its existence into your memory.

It’s absurd in the fact that the entire film is unpredictable and that random thoughts become rationed out though different perspectives. However, this absurdity is what keeps the film interesting. There’s quite a bit to look at here (a gift to the eyes) and enough to intrigue and bring out inner thoughts about life (a treat to the ears and mind). I can’t say that the film will be completely engaging, but I found most of these principles associated with life to be utterly fascinating.

Linklater has many thoughts crowding his head and this seems like the best way of displaying his loopy mindset and ultimately activating the gears in the viewer’s brain. What Richard Linklater does here is provide a way of dealing with dreams; he put a new brand of animation on the map in the process. In the end, Linklater does justice to the mind and brings something distinctive and new to the table. A standing ovation is required.  4/5 stars

Welcome to Central High, where everyone is treated with equal disrespect. Bullies roam the school’s premises in search of timid bystanders and beautiful women to molest. Fortunately we have our hero to save the day, or destroy it with his madman personality. A new kid who becomes agitated over the violence that these bullies inflict on innocent people decides to resort to violence himself to teach them a lesson.

Massacre at Central High sports a cast of unknown actors and actresses who willingly display full frontal nudity and end up getting killed in the process. Writer/director Rene Daalder’s first full length American feature isn’t a complete disaster, for it clearly has a classic feel to it. The constant use of frat boy violence, the transformation of a seemingly normal guy to one who exhibits outbursts of rage, and nearly farcical kills yield a mixture of a violent satire of Animal House, The Incredible Hulk (without the green), and classic slap-happy slasher flicks. It just doesn’t quite work and shouldn’t work with the ingredients provided.

The score here has to be the most ill-suited aspect of the entire film. It just seems that the usage of a violin could have given off a creepy vibe instead of a happy-go-lucky one. Those of you who are looking for a so-called classic with a no-budget effect similar to this one should go rent a film like Sleepaway Camp. The attempts at piling up corpses here are laughable and contrived, due to lack of effort. I do have a keen desire to like films with bad titles and the occasional unintentional laughter, but there is a line to be drawn and this movie crosses it one too many times.

The ending is a huge let-down and the whole experience was just strange and never quite engaging. Everything (the kills, the characters, the direction, etc.) plays out by the numbers and no new ideas are thrown into the mix, leading to a cliched execution.

If you can get past the helpless beginning, unfit score, and wretched line reading, you might be able to find a splash of guilty pleasure here and there. Just don’t count on it. The film never pushes its otherwise respectable concept to its limits and ends up being a film that (just by reading the title) gives you insight on what you’re in for. It’s an instantly forgettable and comically bad film that might possibly have a following considering the interest in revenge films, but I just don’t see it being big enough to develop a fan base. 1.5/5 stars

I managed to get a exclusive look at the upcoming film The Mutant Chronicles, blasting its way into theaters some time in 2008. The exact release date is unknown as of this writing, but it’s certain that it will be some time this year. The big question is whether or not it is worth the time and price of admission.

During the 23rd century, a soldier by the name of Mitch Hunter (Thomas Jane) guides an army of fierce fighters to battle underground mutants after opening a seal to an ancient creation. This creation is a machine known to turn humans into blade-slinging mutants determined to wipe out mankind. It is up to Mitch and his fierce army to save the world. Quite possibly the first ever pen-and-paper-role-playing-game-turned-movie, The Mutant Chronicles is surprisingly satisfying.

Loud, exciting, very funny, and brutally entertaining, it just might be the action film of the year — a movie full of great fight scenes, excitement around every corner, and visually arresting set designs that will hold even the most cynical viewer’s interest. Truthfully, it is the most fun I’ve had at the movies in a long time.

Sporting an A-list action cast that includes Ron Perlman (Hellboy) and Thomas Jane (The Punisher), it is sure to please a certain targeted audience that has a lust for action and a strong appetite for gore. The thrills, the shocks, and the sheer enjoyment of going to the movies is all there and in full, ass-kicking form.

But don’t get me wrong, readers, this isn’t a masterpiece. It does have its glitches like underdeveloped characters, loads of commentary, and Ron Perlman’s acting (which is nearly laughable). Not to mention the small cameo appearance from John Malkovich was unnecessary and could’ve saved the filmmakers a few bucks by casting an unknown actor for this role. Things like that are giving the movie a bad rep after its premier at the Cannes Film Festival. However, there are enough adrenaline-charged moments to flush out these glitches and make for pure entertainment.

In the final act, we get to see Hellboy and The  Punisher go head-to-head in a battle to the death. It’s an exhilarating moment added to the tons of violence beforehand and a great finish to a spectacular fusion of sci-fi, action, horror, and comedy. The Mutant Chronicles is an authentic film and certainly worth the admission price, popcorn and all. 4.5/5 stars

12-year-old Mauro is left alone after his parents get taken away by the military during the regime of 1970’s Brazil. Mauro’s parents told him they were going “on vacation” to keep Mauro from worrying and claim to be back before the World Cup of soccer. Now, Mauro must wait patiently for his parents return from vacation in hope that they will arrive before Pele leads his country to victory.

Like most foreign films, it’s is beautifully shot. Unfortunately, it suffers from leaving viewers who aren’t familiar with the game of soccer isolated and distant from what’s going on. This builds up frustration for those who know there is a good movie to be found here. Foreign film buffs will most likely be pleased and scope out the masterpiece within. However, if you are the casual movie goer, it ends up being nothing spectacular and overlooking the film will save you some precious viewing time.

The first half of the movie is dull and doesn’t show much of a breakthrough until the third act, where we see a glimpse of a great movie. It does have moments of humor wedged in that up the entertainment level, but the bottom line is that even a great ending can’t subdue the mild frustration beforehand.

Vacation is strong in most aspects of film including direction, acting, and cinematography. Cao Hamburger does well at avoiding clichés and directs the film with style, Michel Joelsas gave a true performance as a distraught child, and the cinematography was remarkable. This is what makes it a well made Foreign film and helped gathered up praise from both critics and audiences.

I acknowledge all of the films major accomplishes, but I can’t quite say that it held my interest. The dilatory pace and timid approach nearly put me to sleep and while most of the performances are authentic, the characters are underwritten. This is a film that I can’t recommend, but do see the talent and reasons for its acclaim. A film that isn’t completely original, but still has a refreshing feel to it. Something that isn’t my cup of tea, but deserves attention. 2.5/5 stars

After stumbling upon a book in the basement on their new home, twin brothers Jared and Simon Grace, along with their sister Mallory, become pulled into a world of faeries and goblins. This book, known as The Spiderwick Field Guide, was written by a man named Arthur Spiderwick, who was abducted by faeries. It tells them everything they need to know about how to kill goblins and call upon mythical birds for help. Now they must protect the book from these creatures and find Arthur Spiderwick to put an end to the mayhem.

There really isn’t much good to say about this noisy and frantic fantasy that lacks all but a single good actor. Lazy CGI effects bombard the screen, along with screaming faeries that are about as annoying as nails on a chalk board. It is as if they took the cheapest computer technology available, enhanced it ever so slightly, then decided to add some impaired voices into the mix. Nick Nolte, Martin Short, and Seth Rogen are some of the loud, unfamiliar voices that crowd the screen. It really irks me that these characters are so pesky, yet they are voiced by some rather talented people.

It’s an irritating fantasy that seems rushed and deserved a release to the rental shelves rather than to the silver screen with such poor CGI work. Freddy Highmore plays dual roles comfortably, but the supporting cast of live actors (including Mary-Louise Parker who has shown some serious acting skills in the Showtime series Weeds) were unconvincing and the CGI beasties are about as irritating as an itch you can’t reach.

It starts off with dark, atmospheric set pieces that look really good and quickly turns into a ridiculous story gorged with silly moments. The film’s intentions were to take the audience into a world of fantasy (where ridiculous is acceptable to some extent). Instead, the film goes beyond preposterous and ends up being completely far-fetched.

So we have one good actor, several sub-par actors, an overuse of undernourished CGI effects, and a line of uninteresting characters. It’s a putrid mess, a film that doesn’t have a clue as to what defines entertainment and ends up being obnoxious. It is sad that none of this is quality entertainment and all of it is a nuisance to eyes and ears.

The entire film was a waste of time I could’ve spent watching some sort of solid entertainment, and a waste of money the filmmakers could’ve spent making a better film. The bottom line is it was nothing more than a noisy monstrosity and a eulogy to poorly executed family flicks. 1.5/5 stars

Control follows the true life story of punk rock singer Ian Curtis of Joy Division, covering his troubles with love, music, drugs, and epilepsy that led to his untimely death in May of 1980. It’s based on his wife Deborah Curtis’ autobiography Touching from a Distance to make sure everything is accurately displayed on screen.

Shot in beautiful black and white with magnificent clarity and carefully edited, this slick portrait of a musician’s unfortunate life might be masterful for those who are vaguely familiar with the band Joy Division, but everyone else will probably find it ambitiously clichéd in its character insight. It becomes just like every other musician’s rise and fall from fame. Become famous, get addicted to drugs, and die at an early age. It’s nothing we haven’t seen seven or eight times before and becomes dull quickly.

I’m not claiming this is a bad film. Amongst all the boredom (and there is quite a bit of it), there is a low-energized masterpiece in disguise. It just never takes off that disguise to make itself known. Sam Riley puts his heart into this role and is absolutely phenomenal and Samantha Morton does exceptionally well. The direction is sharp and the acting is great, so why does it feel so boring at times?

I don’t want to disgruntle the fanbase of Joy Division and want to make it clear that I have no desire to put down this remarkable legend. I just feel that the film would’ve been much better with a more interesting take on Ian Curtis’ lifestyle that draws in those who don’t even know the guy. This is where director Anton Corbijn and screenwriter Matt Greenhalgh stepped into a rut.

This gloominess has some serious hang-time and the film in general doesn’t seem to have anything genuinely important to say; it’s an unpleasant and dark film devoid of joy.

This punk rock music isn’t my cup of tea either, which doesn’t help at all. Joy Division’s songs all start off great, but then become flat and gives off a depressing vibe. This is a movie that drains all blithe thoughts from its viewers and leaves them isolated under a muggy rain cloud of sorrow. You can skip this film and still live a perfectly happy life. 2/5 stars

Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com

If you’re unfamiliar with Kar Wai Wong’s style and haven’t seen any of his pictures yet, his first English language film My Blueberry Nights isn’t a bad way to start a rental frenzy and get to know his style. His previous films include As Tears Go By, Days of Being Wild, Fallen Angels, In the Mood for Love, and Happy Together.

Elizabeth (Norah Jones) has had a bad night. She found out her boyfriend is cheating on her, got mugged on the subway, and has trouble getting a car (or even a cab for that matter). But thankfully the generous owner of a diner in New York is happy to comfort her. Still empty with sorrow, Elizabeth journeys across country to find a path to follow unaware that the rightful path is guided by blueberry pies.

The great cast certainly shows a stupendous amount of charisma and becomes the needed component for the interesting script and romantic energy to be lifted beyond boundaries. Unlike most romantic films, this one has such a distinguished chemistry between Jude Law and Norah Jones that (despite from being distant throughout the second act) provide a sort of dignity when finally reunited. It’s an elegant, pure, and stylish portrait of a woman suffering from a broken heart and a man whose life is solely dedicated to baking blueberry pies to flourish his love for her. It’s one of the years better films.

The score is so moving and the cinematography is so spectacular that I can almost guarantee a nomination in one of the two categories come Oscar time. It’s a film that lavishes itself with beauty and romance (a seemingly perfect combination) and then even provides an insight on life and the meaning of true love. Lets not go without saying it does have its flaws, most notably an uneven pace. There are moments of straining heartbreak, sudden acts of violence, and touching romance. With all this melodrama intact, it still manages to get specific points through and looks beautiful doing so.

It has the look and feel of an independent film (The constant use of slow motion, the unique style of camera work, and the occasional insight of the number of days Elizabeth has been looking for true meaning to life) and uses this to its full effect to nourish an interesting story. I like it about as much as I like blueberry pie. And you know what, I happen to like blueberry pie. Be sure to pick up a DVD copy when available in stores July, 1st. The special features include Making My Blueberry Nights, Still Gallery, Q&A With Director Wong Kar Wai and a Theatrical Trailer. 4.5/5 stars

Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com

The star studded and painfully unfunny “Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins” stars Martin Lawrence, James Earl Jones, Margaret Avery, Joy Brant, Cedric the Entertainer, Nichole Ari Parker, Michael Clark Duncan, Mike Epps and Mo’Nique. It’s written and directed by Malcolm D. Lee (Undercover Brother, Roll Bounce).

Roscoe Jenkins (Martin Lawrence) is a well respected talk show host who leaves Los Angeles to reconcile with his family in the Deep South. Rather than being a pleasant reunion with his family, the trip becomes a bruising disaster and a rival competition with a childhood nemesis.

Welcome home Roscoe Jenkins! Or should I say welcome to the dusty, dim collection of DVDs that I will never watch again. It is clear that this is direct-to-DVD material with an A-list cast worthy of funnier matter. Lets cut this game of spot the laughs short and just guide this overwrought bag of mixed emotions and unfunny gags to the dumpster where it belongs. When the film isn’t introducing us to irritating characters and shoving good morals down our throats it’s just an erratic execution of bodily harm, an unnecessary display of pimped out fashion and pea-brained juvenile antics.

The cast tries hard, but the frantic attempts at making the implausible plausible and possibly jerking a couple forced laughs out of the helpless audience becomes tired early. And when things finally take a quick turn for the better in the second half, it instantly goes back to the same dull fashion that cluttered the agonizing first half. The only true minor chuckles came from the family clown, Mike Epps’ Cousin Reggie, who uses his usual goofy style to make some sort of entertainment happen. The only part that remotely resorts to fun is the obstacle course scene, and even this scene feels childish. I never thought I’d say this but more gross out gags and potty humor would have at least been at level with this type of comedy.

Basically, this so-called “comedy” depends of Martin Lawrence’s facial expressions and Mike Epps’ foolish personality to get by. Problem is Mike Epps isn’t always funny and, while Martin Lawrence does make funny faces, he can’t make enough of them to bring consistent laughs in an overwelcomed running time. This material doesn’t deserve such a talented cast. In fact, a cast of unknowns and a direct-to-DVD release would have been sufficient. Other than it being painful to watch, this is a harmless, instantly forgettable, and ultimately flustered comedy absent of any true humor. Just skip it and you’ll thank me later. 1/5 stars

Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com

Welcome Home Roscoe Jenkins is available in popcornmonsters.com’s prize catalog for 2000 pts or 20 reviews.

“The Happening” stars Mark Walberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo, Ashlyn Sanchez, and the dreaded Spencer Breslin. It’s directed by M. Night Shyamalan (The Sixth Sense, The Village, Unbreakable and Signs).

This paranoid apocalyptic thriller centers on a couple named Elliot and Alma (Mark Walberg and Zooey Deschanel) and a little girl (Ashlyn Sanchez) on the run from an neurotoxin in the air. This toxin leads people to loose sense of direction, slurring of speech and finally leads them to kill themselves in innovative ways. Many theories about how this neurotoxin became present in the air, but all of these are just theories. But one thing is certain, it’s happening.

Critics aren’t being fair about M. Night Shyamalan’s newest thriller “The Happening”. It does switch gears from being a creepy and intriguing thriller, to being an intentionally goofy and silly ovation to paranoid thrillers of the 60’s like “The Birds”. However, this works out surprisingly well for some shuddering moments, occasional humor and a well executed finale. This is M. Night Shyamalan’s best film in years, topping his two previous films with ease and winking its eye along the way. Shyamalan sure knows how to please the audience. Even those who dislike the movie, the death of Spencer Breslin is sure to bring a guilty smile to anyone’s face.

The acting wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, shifting from mediocre to subpar levels. It’s not Mark Walberg and his impaired eyebrows and faded voice who failed for the entire act, but Zooey Deschanel who fails with her shallow and strange performance. She may have beautiful eyes, but her character has absolutely no soul. Why is this individual so one-dimensional? However the bystanders that switch into suicide mode give performances that are luculent and bring an eerie atmosphere. John Leguizamo only has one scene where his acting felt completely forced that involved calming a stranger down with a math riddle. The concept might come off as bit silly to some, but in retrospect this one of Shyamalan’s best ideas and his execution (though not completely polished) gives off a Hitchcock-esque vibe. Unlike “The Village”, its ending is complete and unlike “Lady in the Water”, its notion is something that will be admired.

The score is very unique and has a creepy tone unlike any other film. Like a neurotoxin in the air, this one might leave a permanent effect on litterbugs around the world. The intentional humor is being confused with unintentional humor, giving the film a bad reputation. Yes, there is bad acting present and occasionally dense line reading. But In the end, M. Night Shyamalan makes the ordinary extraordinary and does so with what seems like a new approach by adding comic relief to his signature style. I see a lot of talent behind this young filmmaker and his recovery from the embarrassing “Lady in the Water” exceeded my expectations by a landslide. I can now say with complete confidence that I am waiting for his next idea to be scripted, only hoping that it will be just as enjoyable as this one. 3.5/5 stars

 Written by Derek Fleek at www.popcornmonsters.com